Saturday, January 14, 2017

Lessons Learned. .

I am always learning new things as are my children.  The lesson I learned this past year may have been at my children's expense and that makes me sad.
Being a parent is not easy, and I do not say that to mean that you do not already know how very difficult it can be.  I guess I am saying it as a caution to those that come after. 
My oldest has played football ever since he was old enough to do so.  I know many of you have kids that play sports the same way, be it: baesball, soccer, or even basketball.   Sprat has always had a very deep love for football, and has played on some good teams and some not so good teams.   I have never forced my kids to play sports, they do it because they enjoy it.  Sprat played all the sports until he reached high school.  He has only played football for the high school.  Playing a high school sport takes a great deal of dedication and not just during the season but in the off season too.  Our family gave up vacations and cut family visits short so that he could be at most every season and off season training experience.  This was our choice because that is what he wanted to do.  He loved the sport. 
This year changed for him, football stopped being an enjoyable sport.  His team stopped behaving like a team and began to act as every man for himself.  This mentality should have been shut down by the coaches but sadly it was not.  It seemed to be encouraged by some of the coaches and you all know football is a team sport.  It takes a group of young men working together to achieve that win.  Sadly this season was anything but a team.  They did have a winning season but it was not an atmosphere of teamwork.  A few players tweeted on different occasions that they were the star players and they were the reason the team won. 
I shared all of this to say that my oldest son has decided not to play in his senior year.  There are several things that will be going on during this summer with our church that he is very excited to be a part of.  I am not disappointed that he is not going to play, I am disappointed and very sad that he has lost that love of this sport that he has spent his entire childhood playing and loving.   I am also a little mad at myself because I should have made our family and family time a priority over football.  I said earlier that we did without vacations partly because we could not fit them in between football practices.  I wish I had been a better parent and said, sorry our family comes first.  This is the lesson I learned at the expense of my oldest.  
As parents it is our job to set the family as a priority over all other things and yes that includes sports our kids play.  As I look back, Sprat would not have lost anything with regard to football had he missed those few practices to do the family thing.   As parents we must remember that it is our job to encourage our kids to do well but it is also our job to make sure what priorities we are teaching.  Are we teaching that family is a priority?  
I have rambled all over the place today and I am sorry about that but, this has really been weighing on my nerves these last few days.  
Stay tuned as I have said Sprat is going to try his hand at Lacrosse, this should be very interesting.  We also will have a lot more time for family and those all important College tours.  

No comments: